I recently had a conversation with a woman who is unhappy with her life for various reasons, debt, feeling lonely and separated from significant relationships, in a job she doesn’t like, in a town she is ready to leave.
I asked what ideals she has that her current life isn’t meeting. She reflected for awhile and said she would like to start her own business doing something that she’s passionate about and develop healthy relationships with friends who care about her.
These are great things to aspire to … a great way to be content in the present is by looking for things about ourselves and our life that we appreciate NOW! By accepting the reality and goodness in where we are, rather than comparing our present life to our ideal life, we can be content and enjoy the moments we are given.
The comparison, the ideals, can cause dissatisfaction. When I look at any moment, even uncomfortable ones, I find that there is a lot to be thankful for, appreciate, discover and love.
I am not suggesting that we give up our ambitions and aspirations. It’s only difficult when we attach too tightly to them, and then we can become unhappy with the present.
My mom has often quoted Dr. Wayne Dyer in saying, “Be open to anything, attached to nothing”. I think this bears reflecting and considering how liberating it can be.
When we loosen our ideals we can find a place of peace. This becomes a stronger place to take action towards our aspirations … we can find work we can be passionate about, relationships that are meaningful, or whatever we desire to pursue. This can then come from a place of acceptance with our current life and a desire to do something good for ourselves, as opposed to the constant energy drain of feeling discontent.
The Simple Steps: Notice when you feel dissatisfaction. Notice ideals that you may be holding too tightly. Relinquish the grip on these ideals, and consider your present moment.
Really see it with a willingness to discover the good, and find something to appreciate. Accept where you are, realizing that all things in life are in perpetual change. From this place of peace, respond, take action. It might be toward an aspiration, or not, but it’s a response from a good place.
Remember joy is a journey, not a destination… Enjoy this day!
Sheri Geyer is a Christian Life Coach, Realtor, Wife and Mom