New Season… New Role

It’s been several months since I’ve posted to my blog. I’ve missed it… alot!

My life has taken on a new role as Power of Attorney for my mom. This isn’t what I thought I’d be when I grew up. It doesn’t seem to fit. I’m not sure how to do this.

Recently my mom, who is a young 73, was diagnosed with dementia. This is accompanied by other challenges as well. She has a particular cycle that as the day wears on, she becomes more confused and agitated and often doesn’t sleep at night. She spends this time wandering from room to room on an unending search for something, usually from her past. A scarf. A set of keys. Even a child. It has been tough.

My brother, oldest daughter and I have shared the responsibility to care for Mama and keep her in a homelike setting for as long as possible. Based on an updated diagnosis, Mama is in a rehab center for several weeks and then will be transferred to a long term caring facility for dementia and memory care.

I’ve experienced a huge cycle of emotions during this time. Most of them are where I try to determine what decisions my mother would make for herself if she were able. Sometimes, it’s what I would want for myself if it were me.

This has affected every part of my life and has left me exhausted, tearful and confused at times. My confusion is more about how this could have happened and what are the best decisions to be made.

I am not angry. It is what it is. God allows things in our lives for more reasons that we will know at the onset. Over time we will know all about it.

One of the most amazing blessings has been the deepening of relationships. The connection between my daughters and me, my brother and me and the reconnection of a long time friend.

I met Wanda in 3rd grade and we were friends all the way through high school. Life and marriage took us miles and years apart… even though time never separated the memory of that friendship from my heart. A few years back we reconnected on Facebook and begin to re-develop our friendship.

During these last months since my mom basically woke up confused on Valentine’s Day, Wanda has opened her heart and home to me as I have made numerous trips back to the place of my birth and growing up years. It has been the most wonderful experience and blessing I could’ve hoped for. We’ve laughed and cried together as we have filled in the missing pieces of the 30 years that have passed since we were inseparable. It seems as though the years were easy to catch up on and we have a deepened friendship and a renewed sense of connection.

Our new season in life is much like the beginning season. We have always enjoyed amazing commonalities. We are both Realtors and even have the same iPhone 6 Plus and notification alerts on the phones.

The bridge between the years has joyously been rebuilt with new memories and refreshing moments regardless of whether we are texting from where we live 4 hours apart or sharing a glass of wine together in her living room.

In every season, regardless of the difficulties we face, God always has a time and place for refreshment and support.

I’m thankful that at 7 years old, I met the most beautiful lifelong friend! Wanda, here’s to 50 more years of growing up together! I love you girlie 🙂

5 thoughts on “New Season… New Role

  1. Thank you for sharing your deepest emotions and thoughts with us during this difficult time, Sheri. I love the uplifting ending to this blog post about your renewed friendship. It is very sweet and touched my heart. Keep holding on to God’s gracious love, and soon ” your grief will turn to joy” ( John 16:20).

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  2. Sheri, my prayers are with you and the family. I experienced a similar situation with Mama. It is so hard on so many levels but I have no doubt that you will make the very best decisions for your mom. Be good to yourself and let yourself feel how you feel. There is no right or wrong way to go down this path. It is what it is. God is with you. Love, Karen.

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  3. Understand what you’re going through. I’m sure that you will do very well as power of attorney. Try to see humor in what’s going on. I know it’s sad to have roles reversed but it will be sweet memories. My Daddy took Namenda and it helped him to not be so confused.

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  4. Hi Sheri thank you for your encouragement this is exactly what I needed to hear in the midst of my confusion of my new season.
    Love Joan Makoy

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