Many times it feels that we’ve missed the boat or the opportunity or the promotion or whatever. We spend days on the island of “if only” thinking and sitting and sitting and thinking about all that woulda, coulda, shoulda been.
I continue to learn mostly through the generation of my girls, that we really can’t change a culture anymore than we can change the flow of a river, but we can step into the diversity in our world and actually be changed and empowered to make a difference. The time and chance that we can celebrate is that whatever we have done in the form of a “screw up” is often the way we best learn the right way to do something.
After spending many years thinking that perfection is the only way to achieve the desired outcome in any given thing, I realize in looking back, that everything eventually works out ~ screw ups and all! I am more acutely aware of how to do something, if at first I didn’t succeed in my efforts. Each time out, I operate from a place of greater understanding and it impacts my choices, my energy level, and my attitude to be one of hope.
When disappointment is associated with a particular outcome, it is usually because I have attempted to drive it, tried to manage what I can’t control, or simply allowed the challenges surrounding it to become excuses for not doing my part in it.
Recently I met a young man working at a restaurant who after having graduated from college and accepted a job making $100k, he decided that if he were to continue on his current path, he would spend a lifetime having to work harder to buy more in order to maintain a state of happiness because it wouldn’t just come from the work he was involved in. His answer? He went back to school and is presently working to get into med school because he wants to be a part of something bigger – a medical missionary ministry that brings basic healthcare to remote areas where there is none and often when a child is sick, he is kicked out of the home to avoid the risk of the entire family getting sick and dying. In my friend’s words, “no mom should ever have to make that choice … ”
What I learned from my conversation with this young man is that the greatest change happens in us as we become God’s messengers to reach hearts and lives in ways that we never dreamed. It becomes a tireless effort when we are working with passion within the area of our greatest strengths and vision.
Life isn’t a waiting game to get to a place, where we finish school, or get a great job, or get married, or have a child, or get the children reared and through college etc. Life is about now, enjoying today, this moment. The key is realizing that each day we get to start with a clean slate, a new opportunity to view the world differently, through eyes of grace and love. In turn, we receive back what we contribute. How cool is that?
Sheri Geyer is a Life Management Coach, Mentor, Writer, Wife & Mom