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Determining the Need for Establishing Healthy Boundaries ...~ Resentment, frustration and anger are warning signs that alert us to boundary violations.
~ Becoming drawn to those who respect our
boundaries, gives us the support we need to develop healthy boundaries.
~ Boundaries provide the structure for success in our lives and work. When we learn to value what we are
responsible for: such as our feelings, talents, thoughts, attitudes, behavior and personal well-being, we can take
necessary steps to protect them.
~ A major goal in develop healthy boundaries is learning to say "No" when we need to. Supportive people who treat us respectfully can help us to learn to communicate our new boundaries especially when we need to deal with complicated relationships or difficult situations in our lives.
~ Guilty
feelings are normal when we begin to establish boundaries. Setting
limits in our lives may activate a critical
internal judge. When we cease listening to the
overactive conscience and respond according to values of love, kindness,
responsibility and forgiveness, the feelings of guilt will diminish.
~ If we expect others to respect our
boundaries, we need to offer them the same respect. When we are not certain whether we can commit to something, we can say no. If we find that we can work it out, we can change our mind. Saying "yes" is then given out of love and service and not out of obligation.
~ Healthy, mature boundaries provide the freedom to establish values-based goals. Setting these goals helps us determine our God-given purpose and the balance to better navigate life. We
make choices based on what we determine to be important and not out of fear of how others may react.
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